Wow, I wanted to write about this sooner but I’ve been too tired and busy to do so. So I’m going to take this rare moment of free time, and write a little bit about it.
This past weekend I was in Carmel for one of my best friends, Jeff, wedding. I was a groomsman along with Supertall, Hetrick and Perry. So on the way down there, Hetrick and I were rocking out to a CD he had made the night before and it was pretty much the best cd ever. It started off with “Huddle Formation” by the GO! Team and didn’t let up from there. Reel Big Fish, Mighty Mighty Bosstones, Ice Cube, Motorhead??? Yeah, I don’t know how all that awesomeness was contained on that CD but somehow Hetrick made it work. About halfway down it began raining like a mother, but seeing as the Corolla doesn’t have AC I rocked it out with my window down, because I am just that amazing. But we got to our hotel room, and basically got ready for the rehearsal, then rehearsal dinner.
Rehearsal was awesome, all of the bridesmaids were astoundingly beautiful and fun to talk to. Well, except Kristen’s little sister because that would just feel weird calling a 15 year old beautiful when I’m almost 23. But after that we went out to rehearsal dinner, and on the way there with 4 dudes in my car, my suspension was severely compressed. Every speed bump we went over my exhaust scraped. I really need to fix that, but we made it to the restaurant and all of us had grilled salmon, with awesome mashed potatoes, and grilled vegetables. A few of us had ice cold guinesses. Then we headed back to our hotel room to chill out for the big day. Also, David headed back to get Jess (his girlfriend) and we went on a beer run to Meijer…because we honestly drink that much. We came back to the hotel room triumphantly wielding the beer of the Gods. Three of the finest beers that have ever been made…The first, Miller High life 30 pack of pure gold. The second, Red Dog…30 of the finest beers the creator has blessed us with, and finally…Pabst Blue Ribbon. This stuff is so good, I can almost guarantee it was brewed from the sweat off the scrotum of God. It’s amazing.
But after our beer run, Jess and David arrived and I did my speech to see what everyone thought. I’m pretty sure Supertall called me gay, Brian and David said it was good, and Jess slapped David and said she “hated him” It was unbelievable. In a good way. Or something. But after that we tried to go to bed, but really all it was, was a more graphic version of Summer camp. Wherein we made fun of each other, said silly things, and I hit on Jess while David laid by her side and said nothing. Here’s a teaser of what I said….
Jess: What’s my nickname??
As she asks this, Brian finishes his sentence…
Brian: Does anyone want a pillow?
Jess: My nickname is pillow? Why is that??
Drew: Because you’re awesome and I want to sleep with you???
Yeah, I’m that awesome I can say that and not get the shit kicked out of by a girls boyfriend. But after that we all fell asleep.
The next morning, Sean and Brian woke up at 6 am and made enough noise to keep me up til 7.45 wherein I said “fuckitall” and got up. I took a shower, and then we watched American Gladiators until it was time to put on our tuxes. When we started, we realized that we don’t dress up enough because we were clueless on a couple things and Jess helped us out.
But we got to the church, on time and then it was a game of hurry up and wait. We just sat around and waited until it was time. I was freaking out. I don’t even know why, it wasn’t my wedding. Jeff was really calm, as was everyone else. But I was peak freakin hardcore, for no apparent reason. Then it came……show is on the road.
We waited in the Foyer, for our chance to escort our respective bridesmaid down the aisle. Speaking of…My bridesmaid was gorgeous. She was Kristen’s sister, who was a few years younger than her. She was pretty awesome and easy to talk to, so I wasn’t stressed out at all. Also, we walked after Supertall and Kristen’s youngest sister, who happened to be the shortest bridesmaid. So that was comical, so we walked and smiled and got to our spots without incident. When Kristen began walking down the aisle, 2 things happened and I’m not sure which happened first. 1) I began tearing up and getting ready to cry. 2) Everyone else almost started crying. At that moment I knew that I was going to cry during my speech.
But the wedding went off without a hitch, and it was beautiful and we were all really happy. And off to the reception we went. The limo ride was pretty hot and quiet, as most of us were pretty tired from the stress of the wedding, and emotionally drained. Little did I know how much more tired I could become. At the reception, we sat around, mingled, ate, watched Jeff and Kristen cut their cake and before I knew it, it was time for speeches. The Maid of Honor went first, and it was awesome. She didn’t even choke up or cry or anything, then Jimi went (The Best Man) his speech was awesome but he did get a little choked up near the start. Then I stood up, I began talking and all of the sudden it felt like I had an apple in the middle of my throat…I fought it off with one liners and quips, but in the end it was a losing battle. I decided to skip my middle paragraph and go straight to the prayer after my first paragraph. People went crazy, I looked around after my speech and there was not a dry eye in the room. Mission accomplished. Jeff gave a speech after mine and his was even better, I was crying too hard to remember exactly what he said but I remember it being awesome.
After that, it was dancing and mingling and just having copious amounts of fun. Then we went back to the hotel for the hotel party that we told a lot of people about. 4 people showed up to it other than Hetrick, Supertall and myself. But that was fine, it was really fun anyways. The party ended around 2.30 when Hetrick and myself passed out, not from alcohol but sheer exhaustion.
We woke up the next morning around 10, got around, made sure we had anything, then headed home. We stopped at Puccini’s to get chicken diablos and hetrick ate a ranch and sausage pizza. On the way home, we listened to the mix CD again, then followed it up with Sublime. I got caught up in a pack of about 5 cars going 80-85 the entire way and I just hung out with them the entire way to Fort Wayne.
We got in and returned our tuxes, and went our seperate ways for a few hours. Then a few of us met up to see “The Happening”…looking back I really shouldn’t have gone to see that movie. As it was pure crap. So the weekend could have been better, but still……the best weekend of my young life.
Oh, for those curious few as to what my speech was…it went something like this.
“Wow, I know they say save the best for last but those speeches are going to be hard to follow. Uhm, I know a lot of you don’t know me, but my name is Drew and I’ve known Jeff for around 10 years so I felt obligated to give a speech on this day. But first, I want to thank Jeff and Kristen for letting myself and my friends be part of this day. *choke up* Man, I hate you Jimi. I wouldn’t be crying if you hadn’t done that speech. Sean man, I have this speech written down, I may have you just say it. But anyways, I’ve never been in a serious relationship or anything, so I was pretty nervous about this day. And 1 night when Jeff and I were heading back to my house, I asked him if he was nervous, and without an ounce of hesitation he told me “No” and went on to explain that when he met her, he knew that she was the one. MAN! I can’t be crying, I am the man of men. I mean look at this beard!! *Entire hall erupts into laughter and applause* But, all I could do is smile to that, and then he went on to explain that It only takes that 1 girl, and then the rest falls in to place. After thinking about it for a few days, I decided that when I find my girl, if we’re half as happy as Jeff and Kristen…I’ll be one of the most blessed men in the world.
I mean seriously, are they not the most perfect couple ever? How many couples do you know that go to the library to “study” and actually study, or competively play Parcheesi for hours and still say “I love you”? and finally, they put up with my goofy friends and I. For which I’m thankful.
But I don’t wanna hold this party up any longer, so I’ll close in saying that I cannot wait to hang out with them and watch them grow even more. But I’m going to close this with a Irish prayer, mainly because I wish I was Irish and this prayer rocks, so raise your glasses please…Man, I’m shaking so bad that I may drop my glass.
May the road rise up to meet you,
May the wind be always at your back,
May the sun shine warm upon your face,
And the rain fall soft upon your fields,
And until we meet again,
May God hold you in the palm of his hand.”
